1. |
We're Back
01:10
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WE'RE BACK
Jolly Roger's in the house
we know it's been some years.
We're back but we're not wearing black if anybody cares.
We wrote this song to share with you
So you know it's no a lie.
We're rocking out in Quarantine just hoping we don't die.
We didn't break up years ago and this I guarantee.
We just forgot to play a show since two thousand and three. Ohhh...
We're back!
Yea we're back
We're back
We're fuckin' back
Not really a reunion
It's more of a reboot.
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2. |
Booty, Beards and Boats
01:04
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BOOTY, BEARDS and BOATS
Yo Ho Ho
We're not a pirate band.
We just like the name.
So we took a shot.
Avast ye
We do like treasure.
Bootie beards and boats.
And X marks the spot.
Sails away
Sails at night
Cannons at bay
Put up a fight
We're not a pirate band ×3
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3. |
Update
01:30
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UPDATE
John has an injury
In fact it's gotten worse
Brittany still don't get high
But what's that in her purse?
Angela still has her juggs
But they're hanging lower
Hey buddy, forget you man
Says mister Philip Boner
These are the people
We used to sing about
These are the people we know
Mindy Reid learned to read
She went and took a class
Stinky doesn't smell like roses
She still smells like ass
Jared finally got a car
He wouldn't call a lemon
And if you think I fear no beer
I have a big confession
These are the people
We used to sing about
These are the people we know
Just a few people
We thought we should recap
These are some people we know.
Please don't sue us.
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4. |
Scoop McClusky
01:31
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SCOOP MCCLUSKY
I met this little girl
She had a Sherlock hat
A giant magnified glass and
A fat assistant cat
She said she was for hire
If there's anything I need
I asked her what her name was
And she said this to me
She said I'm
Scoop McClusky
The greatest private eye
You couldn't get a lie past me
Even if you try
My name is
Scoop McClusky
I always save the day
And if you have a job for me
You better up and pay
She's always on the prowl
making sure her house is safe
She may grill you for the truth
But she still must behave
She doesn't want to have to go
To time out in the end
Cuz even though she can get mad
She knows it's all pretend
They call her
Scoop McClusky
The greatest private eye
You couldn't get a lie past her
Even if you try
Her name is
Scoop McClusky
She always saves the day
And if you have a job for her
You better up and pay
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5. |
ASMR
01:47
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ASMR
Right inside my ear
Hear you whisper words
I turn up my headphones
So it's all emerged
Sound is all-around
Echoes in my head
It gives me goose bumps
The triggers that you said
And I love, the feeling - of being in a daze
Distractions from my problems
Like my brain, is on - vacation from myself
By turning up the volume
Textures being rubbed
Slime that's being squeezed
Feathers ruffling
The airflow from a breeze
The calm after the storm
The help I need to sleep
The release from my day
I find my inner peace.
And I love, the feeling - of being in a daze
Distractions from my problems
Like my brain, is on - vacation from myself
By turning up the volume
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6. |
She's Punk
00:27
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SHE'S PUNK
Shes punk, punk as fuck
Spiked up hair
Exploited tee
Anything she wants to be
She's punk, punk as fuck
Baseball bat
In her hand
Middle finger at the man
She's punk, punk as fuck
Doesn't have a job
Doesn't pay a bill
Doesn't have to worry
Cause she's hot as hell
Shes punk, punk as fuck
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7. |
DFB
00:56
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DFB
Crusty case
A big disgrace
Shameful race
Filthy rotten
Shitty head
Viral fed
Lies are said
Filthy rotten
Dirty fucking boy
Shameful race
A big disgrace
Crusty case
Filthy rotten
Lies are said
Viral fed
Shitty head
Filthy rotten
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8. |
Theatre Daze
02:07
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THEATRE DAZE
After high school
Got a job at a movie theatre
Made some friends for life
That part I didn't figure
We started a band
Practiced after hours
Partied up on the roof
Stuntdog has Superpowers
Theatre daze
It was the greatest time I'll ever know
The hours sucked
But I never paid to see a show.
Theatre nights
That was our time to have some fun
Best of our lives
I really wish it wasn't gone.
had lots of regulars
Some odd ones that we met
Like crazy popcorn guy
And the lady in the helmet
We shot a movie there
Laser tag in the dark
Kess turning into K-love
Ass punch missing the mark
Theatre daze
It was the greatest time I'll ever know
The hours sucked
But I never paid to see a show.
Theatre nights
That was our time to have some fun
Best of our lives
I really wish it wasn't gone
Theatre daze
It was the greatest time I ever had
The hours sucked
Thinking back it makes me pretty sad
Theatre nights
That was our time to have some fun
Best of our lives
I really wish it wasn't gone.
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9. |
Stimulus / Only Fans
01:23
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STIMULUS
Should I pay half my rent?
This stimulus is heaven sent.
Partial payment on my car
This money really gets me far.
I got six hundred dollars burning a hole in my pocket.
I truly am the richest person I know
I got six hundred dollars burning a hole in my pocket
Enough to live on? I don't think so.
ONLY FANS
If I was a hot girl
Who had some big ol cans
You know what I would do?
I would start an Only Fans
Free for you to follow
For nudes you have to pay
Cuz when you have a bod like me
You don't give it away.
Five bucks to see my peaks
Fifteen more I'll spread my cheeks.
For the right price see my feet
Only fans it can't be beat
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10. |
Harry Warden
01:54
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HARRY WARDEN
Its February fourteenth and we're gonna have a dance
It's been 20 years since our town has had its last
We hope it goes better than it did those years ago
We'll hold our breath and wait to see or hit the mines below
This town has a curse
It started way back then
Now he's here to get revenge
I wonder where he's been.
Run run run away
Harry Warden's on his way
Run run run and hide
Harry Warden is alive
On Valentine's Day hope he don't pick you
He's back in town at the bluff but we don't seem to know
We'll have a party at the mine and everyone will go
We'll eat some food, drink some beers then we'll take a ride
Down into the pit we work we're gonna have a time
This town has a curse
It stated years ago
Now he's back to get revenge
Just like I told you so
Run run run away
Harry Warden's on his way
Run run run and hide
Harry Warden is alive
On Valentine's Day hope he don't pick you
Run run run away
Harry Warden's on his way
Run run run and hide
Harry Warden is alive
On Valentine's Day he just might pick you
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11. |
Your Opinion Isn't Fact
01:22
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YOUR OPINION ISN'T FACT
Just because you think something
don't mean that it is true
Uneducated moron did you
drop out of school
You don't even look up the stuff
you claim to know.
If someone said jump off a cliff
I think that you would go
The doctor must have hit
You too hard when he slapped
Just because you said it
Opinion isn't fact
You're spouting off some real dumb shit
And acting like a God
But your name should be Karen
I find it pretty odd
That you think you're very right
And everyone is wrong
Your brain is smaller than a pea
I knew it all along
The doctor must have hit
You too hard when he slapped
Just because you said it
Opinion isn't fact
Why do I even try?
Your opinion is a lie
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12. |
John's Retired
01:17
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JOHN'S RETIRED
I just got home
from my farewell dinner
and I had two IPAs,
which isn’t a lot for the
amount of Jameson
I used to drink,
but two IPAs
on my pain meds is
a much cheaper high,
Gonna put on my jammies
then get on to kill some zombies
I never was a druggie
I didn't have the money
So video games and beer will have to do.
I used to be much tougher
And now my back must suffer
For the path of life I decided to choose
I'm not fired
I am retired
I'm not expired
At least not yet (I'm a Vet)
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13. |
Wet Bandits
01:05
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THE WET BANDITS
We'll come into your house and steal all your stuff
Dress like a cop to make sure there's enough
Time while you're gone so you won't have a clue
Clog up the faucet and flood you when we're thru
We are. The wet. Bandits.
We act like we're plumbers while parked on the street
Know your house timers our plans can't be beat
Pick a street and wait while you go on vacation
Until we met Kevin that's a sticky situation.
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14. |
Quaran-Tina
01:31
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QUARAN-TINA
She's been inside since March
Hiding from the world
I don't think I've ever met an equal type of girl
She doesn't leave, she doesn't shop it's all delivery
I've only talked with her on zoom I want her here with me
She's my little Quaran-Tina
Like long distance but she's near
Who knows if I'll ever see her
In the flesh, perhaps next year.
She wears a mask to go
Sit on her balcony
Try to yell but she can't hear she's on floor 23
She cleans every single thing with lemon Lysol wipes
It's been nearly nine whole months and yet she never gripes.
She's my little Quaran-Tina
Like long distance but she's near
Who knows if I'll ever see her
In the flesh, perhaps next year.
She's my little Quaran-Tina
Press my hand against the glass
It's like visiting an inmate
Twenty twenty kiss my ass
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15. |
Record Day
01:21
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RECORD DAY
I like to listen to records
Some people say I'm dumb
They hate to hear the pops and crackles
on their favorite songs
I really like the artwork
It's so big in my hands (that's what she said)
I usually only buy the vinyl
of my favorite bands
Nothing beats, putting that needle down...
And turning it up
Nothing beats the warm and fuzzy sound....
Of going old school
(It's record day today)
I've been in line since 5 am
(It's record day today)
I'll spend more money than I planned
(It's record day today)
I really want that box set
(It's record day today)
This is why I'm in debt
It's record day today. It's record day today
It's record day today, it's record day...
to-day.
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16. |
See No Emo / Hear No Emo
02:06
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SEE NO EMO / HEAR NO EMO
Don't like your band
Don't like your song
Don't like the way you do things
It all seems so wrong
Don't like your look
Don't like your hair
Don't like your baggy pants
They always make me stare
Wear All black
And act so mad
I pray to God
This is a fad
See no Emo, Hear no Emo
Add them all together and I still come up with Zero
Don't like your chains
Don't like your clothes
Don't like the way Hot Topic
Still hasn't closed
Don't like your stare
Don't like the rain
Don't like the way you all
Dress just the same
Wear All black
And act so mad
I pray to God
This is a fad
See no Emo, Hear no Emo
Add them all together and I still come up with Zero
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17. |
Not A Song
01:39
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NOT A SONG
This is not a song
It really don't belong
But we needed so many tracks to make a record
This is not a song
To say so would be wrong
It's just a throw away you never heard
This is where, the chorus should be
And it, should be catchy
But it's not
It doesn't exist
It's not real
You must resist
Thinking this is a song
If this was really a song
A new verse would come along
But it's not real so there's nothing here at all
This is where, the chorus should be
And it, should be catchy
But it's not
It doesn't exist
It's not real
You must resist
Thinking this is a song
This song it cannot end
Cause it never did begin
But if it did it would stop
Right now
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18. |
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THE BAND IS BACK TOGETHER
Last time we played together
We didn't own cellphones
But our friend Dwayne had a bag phone in his truck.
Didn't even own a computer
Wrote our songs on a pad of paper
And though it sounds bad now it didn't suck.
Got ourselves in book your own life
To play some other states
But usually there was no one there but us.
It's nearly 20 years later
We figured what the hell
We might as well try once more just because
Things were different
Times were slower
Life was easier
When the band was together
It's been fun writing these songs
And getting back to it
We hope you like these as much as we do
It won't be two decades
Until we put more stuff out
Because I'm back together with the crew
Things are different
Times are slower
Life is easier
With the band back together
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19. |
Disclaimer
00:22
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DISCLAIMER
Ken worked harder on the logo than I worked hard on these songs
Now I'm feeling kinda bad cuz it's like they don't belong
Judge a book by the cover same as you might this disc
I just hope when you hear these tracks you don't get really pissed
Ken worked hard on the logo and I'm feeling like a fool
The album kinda sucks ass but at least the jackets cool!
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